"We are called Beautifully Made because we believe that each and every girl is beautifully made in her own way -- no one is too fat, too thin, too tall, too short, too awkward, too lanky..." -Michelle Kon, itsbeautifullymade.com

Beautifully Made

Here's something that you girls should check out :)

Can’t wrap my mind around You

Can’t put You in a box

Can’t keep You safely contained

You’re gonna move the way

You wanna move today

Just let me follow along

-Francesca Battistelli, Unpredictable

I love night jogs! I absolutely love the fact that the air at night is cool and that it gives me time to just think and well, exercise. Haha. Also, it's always during the jogs that I realize stuff and 'see' stuff that I would probably not have given a second thought to if I was occupied with facebook, watching dramas or something along that line.

Anyway, was jogging 2 nights ago when I realised that I often limit God in so many areas. I have such a limited mindset it's almost scary. I'm not going to blame the way I was educated, the culture, environment I was brought up in because it's really just me who is putting God in a box. I have such limited thinking ranging from the way my cell group should be run, the way to do my daily devotion, university life and even dating (in the future, not now of course). I think small and that's just bad. I don't want to think small.

Look at how Steve Jobs started Apple and Pixar. He revolutionized the industry man! The creation of the ipod changed the music industry. The invention of the iphone changed consumers' expectations. I mean, that's thinking BIG! While all the other phone companies are still using the keypads/small screens etc Apple thought about touch screen and just incorporating what they already created (the ipod) and transformed it to a phone. That's thinking way out of the box. And that's what I want.

No offense to other phone companies out there but I honestly want to go beyond my narrow mindset and think BIG, because only people who challenge and think big make it big. I don't want my thinking to be trapped in a box or be moulded by someone else. I want to dream BIG. I have no reason to be second. I don't want to be mediocre or average. I don't want that. Why do we want to settle for second when we can be the best? And that also talllies with my walk with God.

Why do we only wait till Saturdays to know about God through sermons and experience God only during conferences? That's just not for me. If I can be close to God daily and have a personal encounter with Him moment by moment, I'm going to go straight for that. Ain't going to settle for seconds. Nope. Not ever.

BIG THANK YOU :)

'My heart is confident in you, O God; no wonder I can sing your praises with all my heart!' -Psalm 108:1

Yes, that's it. I want to be confident in God. No one else, nothing else. Not someone else's judgment or opinions. I want to place my confidence in God and not something, someoone or even myself. My God's got the best track record so I have no reason not to place my full confidence in Him :)

Miss Lee no more.

http://www.coldplay.com/lrlrl/lr.html

Click on the link above to get Coldplay's album :D
It's FREE and LEGAL. It's Coldplay's way of saying "Thank you to [their] fans".

Sam, thanks for advertising :)

Hanging By A Moment - Lifehouse

Desperate for changing
Starving for truth
I'm closer to where I started
Chasing after You

I'm falling even more in love with You
Letting go of all I've held onto
I'm standing here until You make me move
I'm hanging by a moment here with You

Forgetting all I'm lacking
Completely incomplete
I'll take Your invitation
You take all of me now

There's nothing else to lose
There's nothing else to find
There's nothing in the world
That can change my mind
There is nothing else


An excerpt from an online devotional:

Who are your Christian “superstars?” A pastor, a musician, a parent, a close friend? By “overrating” you hurt them and yourself. Instead, let us put our Christian leaders in their proper place as fellow strugglers who are striving to be Christ-like and who are using their gifts to serve him. And let’s uphold in prayer our Christian leaders and those in the spotlight.

Do away with the pedestals.

Much Ado About Nothing

"Some cupid kills with arrows, some with traps." -William Shakespeare

Live High - Jason Mraz (Live in France!)

Pedestrain no more! (I wish)

I'm learning driving now and it's completely different being behind the wheel as compared to being in the passenger's seat. So much to observe, take note, watch out for. Got to remember to co-ordinate, not to accelerate too much, brake without jerking, check mirrors, check blind spots... It's an endless list of things to do and things to avoid but honestly, I like every minute of it :) Oh and I drove on the road on my first lesson! :D :D :D

And don't worry, the instructor turns on Symphony 92.4fm which keeps me calm while driving so, NO sudden outbursts or getting distracted = NOT being a hazard on the road haha.

Boston, Massachusetts

A step closer, I hope :)

How He Loves Us - Kim Walker

Have you ever felt that you understand how much God loves you but at the next moment something happens that causes you to feel even more overwhelmed by how much He truly cares? I am discovering and experiencing how much He loves me more and more each day. I don't think that I will ever fully comprehend, but I'm glad that I have a chance to encounter His love daily. One of the things that I realize the past few days is that I am really blessed. And because of that I have so many people to thank. People who taught me much, people who encouraged me. Teachers in school, yes. But I'm also referring to friends who taught me so much just by being themselves and those who have guided me and invested in my life. Thank you :)

'The human catalysts for dreamers are the teachers and encouragers that dreamers encounter throughout their lives. So here's a special thanks to all of the teachers.'

-a quote from Kevin Carroll, a Starbucks guest, published on the side of a Decaf Venti Latte

I'm Letting Go - Francesca Battistelli

My heart beats, standing on the edge

But my feet have finally left the ledge

Like an acrobat

There’s no turning back

I’m letting go

Of the life I planned for me

And my dreams

Losing control

Of my destiny

Feels like I’m falling and that’s what it’s like to believe

So I’m letting go

This is a giant leap of faith

Trusting and trying to embrace

The fear of the unknown

Beyond my comfort zone

Giving in to Your gravity

Knowing You are holding me

I’m not afraid

I have always been really terrible in Mathematics. While others could easily score A* for their PSLE or even get their distinctions easily for O Levels. I struggled and practised and just totally suffered trying to understand those formulas and concepts. So languages and the humanities have always been a breeze for me in comparison to Mathematics and the Sciences and I know that I had an inclination towards the Arts. Basically, I was labelled as a pure Arts student.

So I accepted the fact that I simply suck at Math and my brain is just wired for things far greater than numbers and figures (yes an attempt to console myself). My Math was so terrible that I decided to 'boycott' my O Level Additional Mathematics paper which caused many people to give me the "Why?! Without A Math you won't be able to do anything!", "HUH!?! You didn't turn up for your O Level paper?!" reactions.

And yea, I didn't sit for my A Math paper because I thought "An absent would look far better than an F9" and I didn't regret my decision because I had ZERO understanding regarding A Math. It could have been an easy peasy paper and I would have gotten a single digit (don't judge me k please haha).

I remember that when I made that decision not to sit for my A Math paper I knew that I was allowing the possibility of going to a Business School to slip away. The simple reason being, the pre-requisite for attending ANY Business School in the 3 local Universities would be "A good pass in Additional Mathematics at GCE O-Level or equivalent" and I had none of that.

As I was saying, when I went to JC, I knew very well that I would be pursuing an A Level course in the Arts and I was so happy to finally get rid of Mathematics. Yet, MOE decided to introduce this idea of a 'contrasting' subject one year before I enter Junior College. Which means that I would have to take an extra Math/Science subject in addition to my History, Literature and Economics. The horror! I was so upset when I realised that I couldn't say good bye to the dreaded subject.

I took Mathematics at H1 level in JC and did horribly (which means U grade okay) in J1. And I was thinking "Oh man, this is going to cause my A Level cert to look so bad. Stupid contrasting subject!" But in J2, we started focusing on Statistics and less on Pure Mathematics and I found myself liking Math a little bit more. I did okay in Statistics and realise that I could get the concepts much better than when we did Pure Math. So in J2, when I got my first S-grade (which is NOT a pass by the way) for Math, I was OVERJOYED.

The H1 Math paper consisted of 40% Pure Math questions and the other 60% on Statistics and that helped me greatly. I started passing with an E in J2 and that's good news for someone who fails Math like crazy.

I held onto this possibility that I might be able to study Business now that I study H1 Mathematics. The only catch is that in order to qualify for a Biz course now, I would need "A good pass in Mathematics at H1 level or equivalent ". Definitely an average of U/S/E wouldn't be considered as a good pass. So I contemplated on just simply sticking to pure Arts.

However, the subject that I did the best (in my 2 years in college) was Economics. Literature and History were just okay as compared to my Econs. That's when I discovered that I wasn't exactly a total pure Arts student. During JC, I decided that I wouldn't major in Literature and History in Uni because it wasn't something I had a natural flair for. I could get Econs concepts so much more quicker and score better in it than my Lit and History.

A Levels results were released early in March and I received an A for my Economics and a B for both History and Literature. I got a C for Math (which is average and not considered good, but thank God for it man! Haha). My A Level results: ABB/C, A for Chinese, A for PW and B for GP. For days and weeks, I considered what University to go to and what courses to take. Eventually, I applied to all 3 local Universities and picked courses ranging from Mass Communications, Business to Arts and Social Sciences.

I looked through the Business modules and am relieved to see that there won't be all the heavy Mathematics (vectors, complex numbers, functions etc) but more on Statistics. That's really great news for me. Deep down, I know that with my interest in fundamental Economics (not the Uni econs with tons of math!), my preference for statistics and my liking for writing, a Business degree would be more suitable for me as compared to pursuing a pure Arts degree.

After that whole chunk of writing, I will be really impressed if you read till this point. Haha. Anyway, I received my letter of admission to SMU Bachelor of Business Management today and I have decided to accept the offer.

Now as I look back, I'm truly thankful for everything. I'm so amazed at how nicely everything fell into place. I'm so glad that God gave me a chance to take a contrasting subject, Mathematics, in JC with the revised curriculum. Because of this revised curriculum, it helped me meet at least the minimal requirement to enter a Biz course even though I didn't take my A Math paper during O Levels.

My dad's delighted that I decided to take up a Biz degree (for obvious reasons) and right now, at this moment, I see how God has been directing me step by step and guiding me all along. So I'm overwhelmed with thankfulness at this point.

Here are 2 verses from Proverbs 16 that I read and thought about for the past 2 days.

Proverbs 16:3 Commit your actions to the Lord, and your plans will succeed. (NLT)

Proverbs 16:20 Those who listen to instruction will prosper; those who trust the Lord will be joyful. (NLT)

And since I'm currently reading The Message Bible, I'll quote what it says as well. It says in verse 3 Put God in charge of your work, then what you've planned will take place. In verse 20, things work out when you trust in God. How true :)

My God's a God of details and He never overlooks anything. My future's in the hands of a faithful God and there's really nothing to fear or fret. I really pray that I will never forget this.

And to a few special people, thank you for all your prayers! :)

[EDIT 18 April'09 10:48am]


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